Okay, this one goes out to a specific unit of mine, that alot of friends are in, and alot of new kids about to go roll in the sand for a year, for the first time. Being deployed I always get asked stupid questions, but I dont mind answering them, and I tell my soldiers exactly what I think they should hear.
If your getting deployed, and your not married, take a break. Call it quits for the year, remain friends, and when you come home, the two of you can get together, work things out, or go seperate ways.
If you stay together, chances are one or both of you will cheat. Usually one, and the other one will be pissed as hell, and end up emotionally screwed up over it. Its what happened to me.
And I'm sorry to say ladies, its usually the female in the relationship on either side who is more likely to cheat. This isn't sexist, but rather a rational examination based on two points. Firstly, men who are in the military who are deployed have alot less opportunity to cheat than spouses do at home, unless they are homosexual. Secondly, women in who are in the Military are still a subtle minority, and probably get alot more offers than they would at home.
But this doesn't change the fact that men do it on both sides as well, so keep that in mind.
After you've deployed and come back home, then you can choose to forgive and forget, or what have you. However, it is somewhat likely that both you and your closest friend will have changed multitudes by the time you get back. Especially given the Army's minimum deployment length of a year.
For god's sakes, don't get married or have a kid just for the deployment. I will have to say though, that those who are married or are expecting a family were alot more loyal than others. Engagements were almost all, to 99%, broken in my unit while overseas though.
Another reason, is I can't imagine being married to the person I loved when I was 20, and I'm only 3 years older. Imagine how I would feel at 25???
Anywho, just some advice for you guys out there.
Any other advice, you ask? Keep your hand receipts, and for gods sakes, don't take your M9 apart past operator level! Soldiers break too many weapons.
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Holly sh--, you seemed to have said something nobody else in the military has ever had the courage to say. I never did any cheating...mostly because I was so much older than the rest, I'm kind of ugly and was too busy trying to figure out ways to do our jobs better. I did have a young E-4 female who worked for me the last few months I was stuck indoors due to an injury. She had so many guys chasing after her.
ReplyDeleteIt was kind of funny, a dude would call her and ask if she wanted him to pick up a pizza (camp Victory) and she'd cover the phone and ask me what I wanted on the pizza...then tell the guy to bring it on over. I got free pizza, coffee etc.
I was like her dad and she knew I'd keep her safe. To tell the truth, that's what all soliders need to do; treat the oppisit sex like a brother, sister, father or mother...not try to get in their pants all the time. If somebody can't keep it under control for a year, then they need to go masterbait or something.